- Start out with grand expections of a delicious dinner, your husband's eyes smiling as he discovers one of his favorite meals awaiting him when he gets home from work.
- Add in a bit of a headache, because your darling 5-1/2 month daughter probably won't sleep through the night until after your dear friend's baby - who, by the way, isn't even due until August.
- Mix up your meat and other ingredients from this recipe, stopping every few minutes to get something for your whiny 2-1/2 year old, who for some reason gets up from naps in a cranky mood and is not satisfied with anything you offer her.
- Spend at least 10 minutes forming soft meatballs that don't hold their form too well, but sure will taste good once they're baked.
- Take four steps to the pre-heated oven, holding the tray of meatballs in your right hand.
- As you slightly lean down to open the oven door, for no apparent reason whatsoever, drop the tray of meatballs.
- Be sure some of the mushy meat mixture falls on your dishtowel, the oven door, your cabinet, and a good portion of it in a pile remarkably resembling vomit on your tile floor.
- Also be sure that there are no discernable meat "balls" left on the tray, just one big lump.
- Stand there in stunned silence. At least two minutes.
- Realize that your previously noisy children have the sense to also be in reverent silence at the tragedy they have just beheld.
- Notice that it is now 5:30 and your dear husband will soon be walking in the door and you have zero desire to touch any of that meat with your bare fingers again.
- Salvage what you can, slop it into a casserole dish, and stick it in the oven.
- Furiously clean up the piles on the floor before the dog rushes in to claim them.
- Make the barbecue sauce. Do NOT cry in it.
- Pour the sauce on the nearly baked meatball loaf and shove it back in the oven, not really caring what happens to it.
- Finish the rest of dinner preparations.
- Serve the meatball loaf to the family and realize that it's the tastiest meatloaf you've ever made and everyone (except previously mentioned cranky 2-1/2 year old) absolutely loves it.
- Swear to never, ever drop a tray of meatballs again.
- The end.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010